Friends

I don't know if it's because I'm pregnant, female, or because it was an overwhelming day (full of prenatal information!), but I am feeling very emotional today. I think right now my biggest hurt, or cause of tears, is a certain friend I once had. I met her several years back in College and we hit it off, having sleepovers, carpooling to school, and walking White Rock while licking our ice cream cones. We had serious talks about our life and mainly, why neither of us had a boyfriend! One particular walk we had around the neighbourhood happened only a month (if that) before we both began to date our now husbands. And we both agreed we would never shut out the other friend just to hang out with the guy. And we didnt! I tagged along with them and when Ted came to visit, she would come with us. We even "double dated" over to the island for a day around Christmas time. We talked about how each of us would be in our wedding parties and our tag name was "Fun and Beauty in One package."
Now I realize life changes and situations and circumstances change the way of life. I moved away several months later to Alberta, and by doing so, I left a lot of my friends. However, I believe I've always been the determined type to keep in contact with my friends no matter where I may be or where they may be. This friend became a little harder to keep in touch with. Often ditching out on me at the last minute or showing up only to leave soon after. Both my mom and Ted thought this was not a very good friend but I really couldnt forget our past and how much fun we had together.
When I got married, I did not use this person in my wedding party, however there were many friends I always thought would walk the aisle before me and they never did either (I guess thats what moving away does!). However I wanted all of them to be there with me and I loved that they all came! Including this particular friend I've been talking about.
In the past year, I've seen her once and have received one or two emails from her, although I constantly send emails to her. Knowing that we were nearing the time of her wedding, I sent out an email asking her when the big day was. I heard nothing. Finally I was told by her friend that she did (yes the wedding day was last saturday) get married, and I have now been able to look at her wedding photos online. I feel heart broken. It hurts me not only to have not been invited (though I can live with that), but that she didnt even have the decency to tell me when it was. Like suddenly, because I wasnt invited, she didnt want to talk to me.
I guess I just can't understand why? I don't know what or if I ever did anything to suddenly be mistreated... this isnt the first time in my life where Ive totally been dumped unexpectedly. Leaving me to wonder why people don't enjoy my friendship. I guess, like I said in the beginning, I'm having an emotional day and I guess this has all just been a lot harder for me to deal with. But now thats said and I can go cry into my pillow! ;)